Teen Suicide Talk

uncertainty by ~psychopatheticCHING on deviantART

In my outpatient counseling job I see many teenagers turning to drugs and cutting themselves though only a portion go to adolescent drug rehab programs. As I delve into issues with them at the outpatient mental health clinic I work at, the main issues seem to revolve around friendships, boyfriends, family tensions and academic pressures.

It is easy to discount a teen’s worries and tell them worrying about a boyfriend at age fourteen isn’t important. But, it is to a teen and rejection can be very painful. As adults we are often good at building defenses and a wall, but many teens are vulnerable. Plus, they don’t have many of the outlets that adults have when things are stressful. For instance, as an adult, we can jump in the car and take a ride, drive to the mall to shop, plan a girls night out to forget trouble etc. A teenager often can’t drive and has limited escape options for mental health. There isn’t the luxury of running to a pilates class or getting a massage to try to regain mental peace.

Of course, teens do have ways to diffuse stress such as the internet, cell phone calls, texting and listening to music. Still, if the issues revolve around their friends or dates, many of the same people are interacting and it may just re-inforce the painfulness of the original interaction. If there is additional strain with the family then there just may not be any way it seems to feel good. Adolescent drug rehab can help if the problem gets out of control. If it is occassional use, it’s important to help the person find other ways to feel good which can include exercise that releases endorphins, creative activities like drawing and music or relaxation techniques through tai-chi, meditation and yoga.

If there are family pressures that are the source of the drug problem, brainstorm about an aunt or uncle that the teen can visit for a weekend to just get a new environment. This can help to get a break from each other. It often is hard for teens to open up and one way that is useful for parents is to talk about oneself honestly and an issue that one had and overcame. Don’t be preachy or give a lecture but talk about your own vulnerability, how you felt stuck and the difficult points. This is often why al-anon, aa and other twelve step groups work well because people are able to hear others experiences and understand their process, insights and trials.

Stop by Adolescent Drug Rehab for tips on teenagers and alcoholism at http://www.drug-and-alcohol-rehab-info.com/addiction/index.php/resisting-drinking/

I’m a huge supporter of this group - I wrote a post earlier if you want to Read More

They will be having a Live Webcast on October 5th - Here is some info I found on Myspace -

“Non-Profit OrganizationTO WRITE LOVE ON HER ARMSHosts Live Global Webcast Monday, October 5thFrom Their Florida HeadquartersFeaturing Conversation and Performances ByDamion Suomi and Andy ZipfNew York, NY – September 28, 2009 – To Write Love on Her Arms is a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery. On October 5th the TWLOHA team will expand their outreach by launching a global outlet for honest conversation and community fused with music by Damion Suomi and Andy Zipf.All the world will be invited to see inside the TWLOHA headquarters via SynchLive. Click here to watch: www.twloha.com/webcastFor 1 week after the webcast, fans can download free music from Damion Suomi and Andy Zipf here:www.twloha.com/webcast“Music is something mysterious in that it has many faces. For the person singing, it is their therapy, their story. For the person listening, it is their inspiration, their hope. The goal is for the conversations that happen in between the songs to be as real and honest as the songs themselves. We are attempting to create an environment where people from all over are invited into a conversation about pain and about hope, but ultimately about redemption. We are inviting people locally, and all over the world through the webcast, to come hang out inside TWLOHA HQ for a couple of hours and have such a conversation. We believe that Hope is given a chance to show up in settings like these,” says Rich Sullivan of To Write Love on Her Arms.“There is a line in TWLOHA’s vision statement that says ‘Beyond treatment, we believe that community is essential, that people need other people, that we were never meant to do life alone.’ It took me a long time, but I now understand what that means. There can be so much healing found in a conversation, in songs, and in just being honest with one another,” says artist Damion Suomi.Damion Suomi and Andy Zipf are both artists on the charity minded record label P is for Panda. The label has offered to give away music off Damion’s recent 2009 release Self Titled, as well as music from Andy Zipf’s upcoming record, Our Voice is a Weapon, to coincide with the event.“I am thrilled that TWLOHA have asked two of the Panda bands to be involved in their first ever webcast. When I dreamt about starting P is for Panda, I wanted to work with artists who did not only want to create art, but also wanted to be involved with the bigger picture. I wanted to partner with artists who shared the passion of helping others. Who believed that this world is a community and we can use our individual talents to help. Teaming up with TWLOHA is a perfect example of what this looks like, ”says Chad Pearson owner of P is for Panda.In an effort to extend the conversation of the evening to people around the world, everyone will have the opportunity to send their questions for Damion and Andy via Twitter by replying to @TWLOHA. Questions will be chosen at random and Damion and Andy will respond to them live during the webcast.TWLOHA began in February 2006, when founder Jamie Tworkowski wrote a story, a glimpse into a friend’s life and her first steps to recovery from drug addiction, self-injury, and depression. The story, titled To Write Love On Her Arms, along with the t-shirts Tworkowski printed to help pay for his friend’s recovery, started a movement, not only within his local Orlando, FL community, but one that was swiftly embraced by people everywhere. Many bands (Paramore, Thrice, Anberlin, Switchfoot, Bayside, The Almost) quickly picked up the message, informed their fans, and started finding new ways to donate to the cause and help out.For more on To Write Love on Her Arms:”

Fuck Love by ~fuckedupnightmare on deviantART

Self mutilation is very difficult to understand from the prospective of people who have never experienced the behavior themselves. For family members or friends of someone who self mutilates, it is terrifying, confusing, and frustrating.

There are various definitions of self mutilation, and even plenty of names for this type of behavior. The self mutilation referred to in this article involves the direct and deliberate destruction or alteration of the body. This type of self mutilation is sometimes referred to as self harm, or self injury. Examples of self harming behaviors include cutting, burning, needle sticking, and severe scratching. The person who is doing this usually does not want to commit suicide. I for one, who used to be a cutter, did want to, because I was afraid of the consequences I would have after I died.

Research has shown that individuals who engage in self harm are usually not trying to kill themselves when they engage in the behavior, although some may report that they have mixed feelings about the intent of the acts. This is not to say that people who engage in self mutilation are not suicidal; many people who self mutilate also have suicidal thoughts or even make suicide attempts. In addition, in cases of very severe self mutilation, people have died from their injuries. But, self mutilation usually serves a different purpose than attempt at killing one’s self.

Many believe that people engage in self mutilation to get attention. This is a myth. Most people who self harm do it in private and make sure that the location of the injury is one that cannot be seen. They are also often ashamed of the behavior and keep it a secret. This sort of secrecy and shame about the behavior suggests that it is certainly not meant to manipulate others or to garner attention. Of course, there are some people who report that they self mutilate for attention, but they are in a very small minority.

Research has shown that most people self mutilate in order to help regulate internal experiences such as emotions, thoughts, memories, and physical sensations. People who self mutilate report that they do this behavior to escape from emotional pain, release anger, slow racing thoughts, end episodes of dissociation, or have a sense of control. In fact, for many people who self harm, the behavior probably serves many different purposes depending on what experience they are having at the time.

Unfortunately, self mutilation is not an uncommon behavior. For example, one study found that about 40% of college students have engaged in self mutilation at least once, and about 10% have engaged in self mutilation 10 or more times. There is evidence that men and women engage in self mutilation at equal rates.

People who have experienced maltreatment during their childhood (sexual abuse or neglect, for example) or who were separated from a caregiver in childhood are at greater risk for self mutilation than the general population. Also, there is evidence the people who experience dissociation are at greater risk for self mutilation.

Most people that self mutilate must go through extensive pshyciatric treatment before being able to stop their actions. Self mutilation is often diagnosed as deprseeion, or manic depression.

To me, people self mutilate because they have no other way to let out their emotions. They are afraid to tell someone of their feelings and hurt emotions, and take it out on themselves….by hurting themselves.

People may cut themselves/self mutilate for these reasons: (Disclaimer: I did not write this; I got it from http://healthmad.com/mental-health/10-reasons-people-cut-themselves/ )

1. Many different people that suffer from different forms of depression, cut after reaching a peak in sorrow. Which is very reasonable. Seeing them bleed reminds them that they are still able to feel something, and that life isn’t over yet.

2. Cry for help: Some people cut themselves to show others they need help in life, they need to find something or someone that can give them a reason for why they should be here. They don’t tell to increase the effectiveness of anyone wanting to help them if they somehow find out.

3. For attention: Many teens or other people cut themselves in hope for attention. In hope that someone will care that they do it. These people are usually the ones that go off and tell everyone that they do it, just so they’ll feel bad for them.

4. It puts them in control:  Some people cut in order to see that they are in control of something. Seeing the blood and feeling the pain shows them they can control at least one thing, which is good positive reinforcement.

5. Many different people think that carving their lovers name into them is a good way of showing them that you love them, and that you’ll go through any amount of pain for them. This isn’t always the best idea. Yes some people do think it’s very passionate and caring, but if they truly love you, they won’t want you to do that to yourself.

6.  To relieve stress: When someone cuts themselves, pain relieving chemicals called Endorphins are released to relieve stress or emotional pain.

7. they like how it looks: Alright, I honestly hate when people do this. They only cut themselves to see how it looks, or the cool patterns they can make. This is possibly one of the worst decisions you can make. If you want to do that, just draw something instead.

8. They feel like they deserve it:  Many people are very self-loathing these days and want to do whatever they can to hurt themselves after making bad decisions. Cutting usually comes into play there.

9. They like the pain: Some people are just truly messed up and like being hurt, so they do things like cutting in order to feel pain. But the truth is, when people cut themselves for reasons that actually make sense, they are too worked up to feel any pain at all.

10. DID: Many people suffer from Dissociative Identity Disorder, meaning they have somewhat of multiple personalities. And the only way they could get through the different problems and different pain, was cutting or self-harming to relieve it all.

Cutting yourself to fit in and be emo is NOT cool. It is disgusting and just…it makes me sick. Cutting yourself is a serious disorder, and when stupid teenagers mock it, it is not cool. It is stupid. so, if you are an ‘emo wannabe’ stop it. Emo is a style and type of music, not a group of lonely kids who cut themselves. So stop.

I hope that from reading this article, you have learned what self mutilation is, and how to accept it and not mock it. It is an extremely serious disorder that many people have. Hopefully, you’ll learn to reach out to these troubled individuals and teach them how to truly cope with their mismatched feelings.

Author:  Charissa

Medusa by =mumiah73 on deviantART

Yes—a person can indeed ‘break down’ suddenly. The human body is a fragile mechanism that, when put under too much stress, will stop functioning normally.

A person exposed to long-term, unrelenting severe stress is particularly vulnerable to experiencing a ‘breakdown.’ How does a breakdown manifest itself? The primary characteristic of a breakdown usually involves some sudden disintegration of the self. This means that an individual who usually follows a set pattern of behaviors will suddenly break away from their routine. Imagine this scenario: a person wakes every morning, goes to work, seems to function normally, visits with friends as usual, and then returns home. Imagine this person suddenly waking one morning and unable to get up. They have lost their drive, their ability to function normally, to communicate with family or friends. Perhaps they are even incapable of dressing or eating. This person is experiencing a nervous breakdown.

What other types of symptoms might be described as those associated with having a nervous breakdown? Some individuals might experience the uncontrollable need to cry, loss of energy, withdrawal, confusion, despair, inability to think clearly, sleep disruption or insomnia, loss of pleasure in everyday activities, feelings of worthlessness and depression. These “down and out” feelings are characteristic of depressive disorders.

Some individuals have breakdowns that manifest symptoms of psychosis. Breakdowns involving psychosis may involve hearing voices, seeing visions, feelings of paranoia, feelings of being pursued, feeling sensations that are not really present, grandiose or delusional behavior, bizarre public behavior, feeling of jealousy, and feelings of violence.

Whatever the nature of the breakdown, all breakdowns have in common the inability to function as normal.

What is a nervous breakdown really? A person who experiences symptoms of a nervous breakdown is suffering from some sort of mental disorder. That is, despite what we used to think, a nervous breakdown in and of itself is not an illness or disease. They are merely symptomatic of a larger problem. In fact, no legitimate physician or mental health professional would ever diagnose someone as having a nervous breakdown.

The characteristics of a nervous breakdown can be symptomatic of a large variety of mental illnesses. The most common illness that resembles these characteristics is a Major Depressive episode. Other disorders that are related to what we think of as a nervous breakdown include panic attacks, generalized anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder and other trauma disorders, acute stress disorder, schizophrenia, psychotic disorders, bipolar disorder, depression, and mood disorders. All of these mental disorders are characteristic of what many laypeople would characterize as a nervous breakdown.

Who is most likely to suffer from a nervous breakdown? Almost anyone who is subjected to undue stress is capable of experiencing a nervous breakdown. For instance, any person who has been subjected to extreme stress and trauma is vulnerable to experiencing a disorder that mimics the general perception of a nervous breakdown. For instance, a young person returning from battle may experience symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder.

A woman experiencing severe depression after the birth of her child may experience post-partum depression. How can a person suffering any of the characteristics of a nervous breakdown get help? Sometimes the hardest part of recovery is getting the person to visit a doctor. For some kinds of mental disorders, a nervous breakdown can be a blessing in disguise. An individual suffering from severe anxiety or depression may find her self speaking to a psychotherapist for the first time. A person who suffered alone for long time may suddenly find himself getting better with medical attention. In many fortunate cases, the person who experienced the nervous breakdown may emerge from therapy stronger and healthier than ever before. Treatments can include antidepressant and psychotropic medications, psychotherapy, and prescribed periods of rest.

Prevention of nervous breakdowns is an oft-ignored subject that researchers are beginning to study. The characterization of a nervous breakdown as something that happens very suddenly can be misleading. In many cases, symptoms of the coming breakdown are present, but either the individual or their family and friends ignore them. Individuals who sense themselves becoming increasingly stressed, depressed, angry, or violent are encouraged to seek help immediately.

undiscovered by ~lyddie on deviantART

Found this article on NY Daily News

The parents of a British 15-year-old schoolgirl blame “huge pressure” and “modern complexities” of social networking Web sites for the suicide of their teen daughter, The London Times Online reported Monday.

Holly Grogan jumped 30 feet to her death from a bridge last week and was hit by traffic after abusive messages were relentlessly posted onto her Facebook page, according to Times Online.

Her parents, Steve, 45, and Anita, 44, warned other families of the dangers of cyberbullying.

“Holly struggled to cope with the huge pressures placed upon her by the modern complexities of ‘friendship groups’ and social networking,” her parents said in a statement. “Every responsibile parent will empathize with our constant battle to instill self-belief and confidence in our children.”

Holly, who attended St. Edward’s School in Cheltenham, “had the biggest smile in the world,” but was targeted by girls at the Catholic school, said her friend Chloe Davis, 16.

“Girls used to gang up on her and call her names and she didn’t have anything to say back,” Chloe said. “She just froze up. Girls used to bully her on Facebook and leave comments on her wall calling her names. They’ve probably all deleted them now.”

The bullying was so bad at Holly’s first school that she had to switch, said Chloe, who attends Chosen Hill secondary school in Gloucester.

But the abuse didn’t stop.

“I heard that the girls who bullied her at her old school told their friends at her new school to bully her as well, and so it just kept on and on,” Chloe told Times Online. “Apparently there was a girl at her school yesterday who was running around crying because she used to bully her, but she should have thought about that at the time.”

Despite the tragedy, Holly’s parents, and her brother Tom, 17, held on to happy memories of their “beuatiful, kind and caring Holly,” whose “outwardly vivacious zest for life was apparent to all who knew her.”

The Grogans were also found solace through cybermessages of support.

“The family has been greatly comforted by the comments and tributes left on various social networking sites,” the Grogans’ statement said.

Holly’s ordeal and subsequent suicide echoes the tragedy of Megan Meier in Missouri. The 13-year-old MySpace user connected with a group of people who created a fake account in 2006 under the name “Josh Evans.” When one of the fake users, writing as Josh, told Megan the world would be a better place without her, Megan hanged herself in her bedroom.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/2009/09/21/2009-09-21_parents_of_holly_grogan_15_blame_facebook_for_teens_suicide.html#ixzz0RzPfmcQH

Silence of the heart by *DoraLovey on deviantARTI overheard my twelve year old son talking with some of his friends this past weekend and what I heard really scared me.  They were talking about a friend of theirs who drinks.  We don;t drink in our house and guess I just never thought he would have a curiosity for it at such a young age.  I used to drink a lot in high school, a lot.  I would sneak whiskey from my parents stash, poor it into a jar, stick it in my purse and start drinking it as soon as I walked out of the house.  I continued drinking throughout the day - This was just the beginning of a long road of addictions.   I’m scared for my kids but hope that with enough information they will take another road.  I find stories all over the internet that terrify me.  I ran across this story while researching teen drinking:  Visit Site Here

It was two years ago when Leandra Ybarra almost died from alcohol poisoning. She was 15 and skipped school with her friends to go down to the river to drink some rum. 

“I finished a whole bottle in less than 30 minutes or so, I mean I blacked out the last thing I honestly remember is my fishing pole falling into the river, since we were down hill they had to actually drag me up and when I was in the hospital all my jewelry was missing and I had bruises and cuts and like, like, hand marks like of their fingers from grabbing me and pulling me up.” 
 
Ybarra is now a senior at Pioneer High School in Woodland, north of Sacramento. She looks down when talking about what happened after she blacked out and her so-called friends got scared. 
 
“They ended up leaving me at some apartment complexes. When they left me it was because I wasn’t waking up and I was unconscious and I couldn’t breathe. They deny the fact that they left me for dead but I mean there was no way that they tried to help afterwards.”
 
When Ybarra got to the hospital, her blood alcohol level was 0.5 – that’s five times the legal limit. She was hospitalized for a week. Ybarra’s mom, a single-parent, Lucinda Barron, says she was in shock when she got the news.

“I didn’t think it would happen to my kid. A lot of the times when your kids away from you really don’t know what they’re doing. These kids go to parties and you know that there’s alcohol. I would say at least 80 percent of the time.” 

And Ybarra says her mom is right – she estimates about three-quarters of the kids at her school drink, often at house parties with people in their 20s.  And says for many teens, it’s all about how much they can drink.

“There’s no I’m going to have a buzz and I’ll be OK, they drink as much as they can take in before either blacking out or passing out.” 
 
Life threatening events like Ybarra’s are on the rise according to new research from the UC Davis Medical Center. In the last three years they’ve seen a 30 percent increase in kids between 12 and 17 coming to the ER with trauma from binge drinking. Christy Adams is a Registered Nurse at UCD Med Center.

“We are seeing younger children coming into our Emergency Department as young as nine and we did actually have a six year old that came in intoxicated.” 
 
These days Adams says many kids take their first drink before they’re thirteen.  Experts can’t point to one clear reason for this trend, but they say there are two potential factors: a lack of parenting coupled with increased marketing to youngsters by the alcohol industry. Adams says many parents just don’t think underage drinking is a big deal.

“There is a general complacency within parents and within society as a whole that it’s OK for teens to drink if it’s in the home, it’s a safe environment is what they’re assuming, it’s a rite of passage or I did it as a teen and I turned out OK.” 

At the same time, watchdog groups claim the alcohol industry is targeting a younger audience – middle and high school kids. Michael Scippa is with the Marin Institute.  He says this clever marketing — and packaging — helps teens get alcohol.  
 
“Youth have gone shopping with a parent, in a grocery store and the youth will put in a six pack of Sparks which is an alcoholic energy drink that looks remarkably like orange soda, and the parent will just pass through the check out line with it.” 
 
Scippa says these are called “alcopops” – energy drinks with alcohol, or sweetened alcoholic products like Mike’s Hard Lemonade. He says they’re meant for underage drinkers. 

But, Alcohol industry representatives deny the allegations and say authorities should instead go after adults who supply alcohol to kids.  Zsoka McDonald is with Diageo North America, which makes flavored malt beverages like Smirnoff Ice.

“Diageo does not want the business of anyone under the legal drinking age, nor do we market our products to anyone underage.” 
 
Different groups are taking action to stop teen drinking. UC Davis Medical Center and a few other regional trauma hospitals got a $600,000 grant to address the problem. They’ll train ER nurses to do immediate interventions or “wake-up calls” about underage drinking on-site with the teens and their parents. In the last year, the California legislature was the first in the country to pass a law forcing alcopop makers to put bigger labels displaying alcohol content on their products. 

And teenagers themselves are doing their part. After her near-death experience Leandra Ybarra decided to become an example for others. She’s given presentations at her school and she’s a leader in a teen peer group that’s trying to stop underage drinking.

My precious II by *The1stGrape on deviantART

Opening the Lines of Communication

If you want to be treated like an adult, then you have to act like one. People will ignore you if you throw tantrums. Don’t be accusatory–no matter how wrong you may know they are. This means addressing problems in the following format (which is great for negotiating with parents or addressing any problem or confrontational situation):

“I feel (insert emotion here) when/that you (insert action here) because (your reasons). Please (insert what you want to happen here).” Example: “I feel upset that you gave me a B+ on this paper because I worked very hard on it and think I deserve an A. Would you please reconsider this grade or at least tell me what I can change next time to get an A?” Approach you parents at a time when you think they are open to listening to you. Don’t ask them when they are rushing out the door because they are late for work. Say “Mom (or Dad), I have something really important to discuss with you.” You won’t be able to get everything you want, but you’ll feel better knowing that you tried your very best. And just like the New York Lotto “Cause hey–you never know.” unless you try, that is. Try to see things from the other person’s perspective. 

Parent Divorce

It’s normal for kids to feel angry, hurt, guilty, sad, and scared about the future when they find out that their parents are getting a divorce. Suddenly you’re faced with all of these questions about where you’ll be living and who’ll be living with you. Your lifestyle is about to change forever–pretty scary stuff. It’s also normal for kids to feel relieved, glad, and really ANY OTHER WAY. This is okay. All feelings are allowed, okay, and acceptable. Feelings by themselves are never bad; what you do with those feelings, though, can be healthy or unhealthy. It’s important for kids to find healthy outlets for their anger and aggression. Punching pillows is okay; punching people is not okay. Kicking stuffed animals is okay; kicking real animals is not okay. Don’t take your anger or aggression out on other people or on animals. Crying is okay, too. Some kids find that keeping a private, secret journal that nobody else will ever read helps them deal with their feelings. Some kids take up karate or running to deal with their feelings. You can probably think of many other healthy, positive ways to express your emotions.

Talking with somebody often lessens the pain. You can talk to a parent, a family friend, a teacher, or anybody else that you enjoy talking to. It can be difficult to talk at first, but talking sure can make you feel better. There are also adults out there who are trained to talk with people about their problems. These people are called social workers and psychologists. Maybe you can talk to one of them.

When parents get divorced, it doesn’t mean that they stop being parents and it definitely DOESN’T MEAN THAT THEY STOP LOVING THEIR CHILDREN! Even when a parent moves really far away, he or she is still a kid’s parent! Parents are still parents when their children are adults. Once you are somebody’s parent, you are always somebody’s parent. It’s important to remember that it’s NEVER A CHILD’S FAULT THAT THEIR PARENTS ARE GETTING A DIVORCE. No two divorces are exactly the same because the reasons people get divorced are so different. There are lots of different reasons. One thing that is for sure, though, is that kids are never the reasons that parents get divorced. It wasn’t something you did or didn’t do. But just like you didn’t do anything to cause the divorce, you can’t do anything to get your parents back together, either. Sometimes parents work things out and get back together, but most of the time this doesn’t happen. Trying to act extra good or extra bad to get your parents back together is not going to work.

Life doesn’t always go the way you want it to and some times are worse than others. Your parents may start dating again and meeting new people. They may even get remarried, which means that you may have a stepmom or stepdad or even stepbrothers and stepsisters. This can be really tough for you, but if you learn how to ask for help when you need it and try to accept or maybe even like the things that you cannot change, you could have two loving families instead of one.

this city, burning by ~mutedmargot on deviantART

I cry myself to sleep because it’s the only thing I can do right,
I avoid you because I would rather be alone,

I dress in black so I can be invisible at night,
I stay out late to avoid the fights that go on at home,

I remain misunderstood because no one wants to understand me,
I play my music loud so no one can hear me cry,

I rebel because no one will let things be,
I make a scene so you will notice if I die,

I cut my wrists so I know I’m not numb,
I sleep in late because I’m afraid of the day,

I don’t try because everyone just assumes I’m dumb,
I don’t talk because I have nothing to say,

I guess I don’t need to be understood, I’ll be alright,
I just needs you to leave me alone!

Or I might just crumble out her in the dark
engulfed in my own darkness.

by:  Anonymous

The Way by =xxchange on deviantART
 

Anger seems to be one of the primary emotions with which most people consistently struggle. Anger can be an extremely SCARY emotion for an individual to feel…it is powerful and therefore difficult for people to HOLD. “Holding” in the psychological sense means the ability to tolerate an emotion and allow for the actual feeling of it. Children have temper tantrums. They get angry…sometimes really angry! This can be a problem if a parent doesn’t set limits on this expression. However, if a child is not allowed to feel this anger, then it goes somewhere else…it is suppressed and hidden, and can be unresolved and not directly expressed for years.

Sometimes this unresolved and unexpressed anger seeps out in destructive ways and can lead to violence, substance abuse and even depression, (which is often described as anger turned inward). It is often very difficult for individuals to admit that they are angry…at anything or anyone. For many, there was a “script” somehow given to them as a child that they cannot get angry without being made to feel ashamed for it or punished. This punishment can be confusing if it is not explained to a child in an empathic way.

Many parents cannot handle their own anger so it is impossible for them to not have a reaction to their children’s anger. These parents become afraid to see anger in their children as the parents are afraid to see it in their own self. A common reaction to this is to “throw” this anger back at their children via shaming, confusing punishment or even bigger “adult rage” (which to a child is even more terrifying than their own rage.) This inability for a parent to hold anger causes the childs’ rage to become suppressed.

PROJECTION of anger is very common. Quite often, an individuals’ rage is “split off” and then “projected” on to someone else. For example, if an individual is holding suppressed anger that was not allowed to be expressed as a child in a containing and holding environment, this individual will more easily project this anger on to the driver who cuts him off on the freeway, or might even develop a prejudice against another culture (the members of this culture become “the screen” for this anger to be projected upon).

SPLITTING is the precursor to projection. If a feeling is so intolerable, then this feeling will be in a sense broken off from a persons’ consciousness and thrown (projected) into someone else so that the other will have to hold (feel) this emotion.

PROBLEMS:
1) Anger is SUPPRESSED. Suppression can lead to agression, violence, substance abuse, anxiety, depression etc.

2) Anger is PROJECTED and misdirected onto another person or group of people, leading to prejudice and intolerance.

3) Anger is NOT HELD or TOLERATED by another, (especially primary caregivers during development), leading to the message for a child that anger is TOXIC and should not be felt or expressed.

SOLUTIONS: Anger is RESPECTED, HELD and CONTAINED by primary caregivers…Meaning a child is given BOUNDARIES. Children actually want and need boundaries…as it allows their anger, (that often feels out of control and without boundaries) to feel HELD. Rules and discipline are important for this, but given in an UNSHAMING manner.

EX: “I understand that you’re angry. It is frustrating that you can’t have another cookie, but that is how it is. You need to accept that.”

When your teenager starts to get out of hand you have to ask yourself some hard questions. The first step is to honestly evaluate how you think you’re doing when communicating with your teen. Do you feel you are sharing valuable information and time? Or do you feel there is a communication gap and he’s hiding something?

Look for these warning signs:

� Low self-esteem

� Out of touch with reality

� sudden personality changes and mood swings

� Violent behavior

� Drop in grades and school performance

� self destructive actions or language (suicide threats or extreme diet & exercise)

� reclusive tendencies

� debilitating fears

Any of those behaviors done on a frequent basis can indicate a problem. At this point you should seek outside assistance. Don’t be too proud to ask for help.

If you feel your efforts aren’t working (or aren’t good enough) first enlist the assistance of your extended circle of friends and family. Get everyone involved to bolster the spirits of your teen. Show him that he has a support system in place that he can count in. Work on building back trust in your relationship. If your child opens up to another family member better than you, keep your resentment inside, the focus should be on helping your teen.

Sometimes you need to bring in professionals. Don’t wait too long on this step if your child is getting out of control. A delay can be costly. But where should you turn next? Consider these options:

� School guidance counselor - this person deals with teenagers (especially troubled ones) on a daily basis, they are an excellent resource for insight into what might be happening among the social scenes at school. They also have quick easy access to your child during the day.

� Outside counselors and psychologists - These professionals have degrees in counseling and therapy. Some specialize in therapy while others focus on testing. Its best to find someone who deals with teenagers a lot, they usually relate better to the younger generation.

� Social workers - these individuals are often called in to work with families as a group and are quite familiar with emotional problems in a social setting. They can help identify issues related to family dynamics. This can be helpful if there are frequent conflicts at home.

� Psychiatrists - these are medical doctors (yes, they went to medical school) who are allowed to prescribe medication and can hospitalize patients. Generally you would reserve this professional for a later step as licensed counselors are often a less expensive and personal approach to teen troubles.

Therapy can become expensive so check with your insurance plan to see which services are covered. Some companies impose limits on the type of services available and/or the frequency of visits. If cost is an issue don’t forget that school counselors are typically free. You could also contact a local university or college, free clinics, counseling training programs, and state run offices. Some offices offer sliding scale pricing for lower income families. It’s important not to let money stop you from seeking help. The wellbeing of your child and your family depend on it.

The Troubled Teens Resource seeks to provide assistance for teens and their families to help during stressful times. All information in this article is the opinion of the author and not meant to replace sound medical and professional advice. Always seek the assistance of a professional in dealing with a troubled teen.

portrait 2 by *nheira on deviantARTWell school has started and the fighting has begun.  My 10 year old is still a very angry boy.  After 6 months of therapy he still threatens to kill himself and the family.  I hurt for him.  I know that for him to act the way he does that he is feeling a lot of pain - and he can’t figure out why.  I’ve been there - I get it.  I just wish there was a pill I could give him to make it all go away.  It is starting to have a very negative impact on his little sister.  I need to add something new to the mix. 

We’ve seen the worst of this rage in news headlines, from school shootings in Littleton, CO, and Red Lake, MN, to more recent examples: a 7-year-old boy in Tampa, FL, who allegedly beat his 7-month-old half sister to death, and a 9-year-old Brooklyn, NY, girl, who allegedly stabbed and killed an 11-year-old friend over a ball. But for every sensational story of youthful rage gone amok, there are thousands of quieter tales of parental helplessness in the face of kids who fly off the handle.

Clearly, acts of aggression are no longer confined to the privacy of people’s homes. They’re being played out in public places — at increasingly young ages. A recent study by the Yale Child Study Center in New Haven, CT, found that preschoolers are being expelled at more than three times the rate of K-12 students. Another recent survey of childcare providers, elementary school counselors, and pediatricians in Tarrant County, TX, found that more than 85% of the counselors who responded said kindergartners today have more emotional and/or behavioral problems than five years ago; 67% of childcare providers reported a similar trend with the young children in their care. “This is happening in schools all across the country,” says Ronald Stephens, executive director of the National School Safety Center in Westlake Village, CA. “We’re hearing about first-graders and kindergartners who are cursing and punching teachers and hitting classmates.”

Studies indicate that it’s critical to intervene early — before lifelong patterns of extreme, explosive behavior take root. “If a child is still very aggressive by age 8, he is at risk for being violent in adolescence and adulthood,” says James Garbarino, Ph.D., professor of human development at Cornell University in Ithaca, NY, and author of Parents Under Siege.

Tree by =jemapellenicoletta on deviantARTPrescription drug misuse and abuse is cause for great concern. As of 2008, teens cite prescription drugs as the second most accessible drugs available to them, after marijuana. Teens also view the drugs as ’safe’ highs. Prescription drugs are medications that should only be used as prescribed. The addictive potential of prescription drugs is the same as that of illegal drugs — such as cocaine or heroin — and the consequences of use can be severe.

Some people experiment with prescription drugs because they think they will help them have more fun, lose weight, fit in, and even study more effectively. Prescription drugs can be easier to get than street drugs: Family members or friends could have a prescription. But prescription drugs are also sometimes sold on the street like other illegal drugs. A 2006 National Survey on Drug Use and Health showed that among all youths aged 12 to 17, 6% had tried prescription drugs for recreational use in the last month.

While figures for some kinds of drug use among teens have dropped slightly over the last several years, prescription drug abuse shows no signs of letting up. Supporting this abuse is the ease with which our young people can lay their hands on prescription drugs to abuse, particularly prescription pain relievers such as hydrocodone, often marketed as Vicodin.

A recent report from the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University shows that one-third of teens who know prescription drug abusers say that these kids get their drugs from home. Another third say they can get these drugs from a friend or classmate.

The annual survey of teen attitudes on substance abuse drew the conclusion that probably half of all prescription drugs being abused by teens are coming from someone’s home medicine chest.

And this ease of acquisition showed in the statistics on prescription drug abuse. By 2007, one in every twenty high school seniors had found and tried OxyContin, a powerful narcotic painkiller with a high, when abused, similar to heroin. While this is bad enough, the statistic of seniors who had abused Vicodin, a painkiller containing hydrocodone, was almost twice as high.

Prescription pain relievers like hydrocodone and oxydcodone are addictive, whether it’s teens or adults abusing them, stated Derry Hallmark, Director of Admissions and a Certified Chemical Dependency Counselor at Narconon Arrowhead. Narconon Arrowhead is one of the country’s leading drug and alcohol rehabilitation centers, located in Canadian, Oklahoma.  We help people of all ages, from eighteen to seventy-five and up, recover the drug-free life they lost. Seventy percent of our graduates remain drug-free after graduation, as a result of our holistic program that addresses the three main barriers to recovery: the cravings, guilt and depression experienced by every addict.

Incomplete lullaby by =iNeedChemicalX on deviantART
Eighteen year old Cincinnati area girl, Jessica Logan, made a grievous mistake, an all-too-common mistake being made by perhaps millions of other teenagers, predominantly by teen girls. She had texted, “sexted” is the popular term, compromising pictures of herself to a boyfriend and, after their breakup, he and/or five of her “friends” forwarded the pictures to hundreds of other girls.

The actual forwarders seem in dispute but what is incontrovertible is that some of her peers in and around Jessica’s high school chose to share her pictures with countless others.

The result for Jessica was a living hell. She was shunned, expelled from parties, taunted and bullied on Facebook and MySpace, and she received endless, random phone calls accusing her of being a slut. She ended her personal hell by resorting to what she felt was her only recourse. Jessie hanged herself in her bedroom last July 3rd.

To her parent’s great credit, only months after that horrific event which caused her mother’s mental breakdown, they are now speaking out in hopes of forestalling “copycat” suicides by other teens as a consequence of such sexting. Following their daughter’s lead-Jessica had gone public on television in May, “to make sure no one else will have to go through this again”-Cynthia and Albert Logan have launched a nationwide effort to help curb sexting by children and are seeking stringent laws to limit or eliminate such activity.

We hear a great deal about rights nowadays, and precious little about
responsibilities. “Rights advocates,” (the ACLU), have now entered the sexting picture, with little concern for the hapless victims of that craze, and have instituted legal actions to defend, preserve, and protect the right of minors to willingly exhibit their bodies for public viewing.

The constitutional question of freedom of speech should be irrelevant as applied to this current craze of teen sexting. I would go so far as to dare “constitutional scholars” to go to court contending that minors have that right and privilege, via either text/sex messaging or direct internet postings. They would, or should, be laughed out of court.

Then again, such objections could be upheld in today’s liberal tribunals.

Sometimes we forget, and despite their efforts to appear otherwise and despite nature’s efforts to make them appear adults, adolescents are far from adulthood. Whether their chronological ages are 12 or anywhere up to 17, they are still children both legally and insofar as their intellectual and emotional maturation. Many are able to “pass” as older and many of those are the ones most in danger from themselves and from the adult world they are all too eager to join.

Jessie, an only child, may have been one of those kids who are so enthralled with the allure of the trappings and freedoms of adult life that in their haste to be full-fledged “grown ups,” they are rendered oblivious of the pitfalls and challenges of that stage of life.

Jessica Logan was a typical Ohio teenage girl, vivacious, compassionate, artistic, outgoing. All of those traits were thrown into reverse when she learned that what she had thought were her private pictures had been widely disseminated. Jessie learned the very hard way that life can teach extremely stern lessons.

There has been no definitive study on precisely how many teens actually do engage in the dangerous practice of sexting. One estimate says 22%, although some high schools report that up to 50% of students have “inappropriate” pictures on cell phones. Still other stats suggest that 39% of teens have sexted and 48% of teens admit to receiving such messages: http://www.momlogic.com/2009/03/when_sexting_leads_to_suicide.php .

“Inappropriate” was not defined but many of those pictures evidently go beyond merely inappropriate and whatever the actual numbers, they are significant and too many.

What has been confirmed is that teens are taking nude or semi-nude photographs of themselves on their cells, then sending the pictures on to friends. Some of those trusted and equally-foolish, or vindictive, friends transmit those pictures to an unknown number of others. Some post them on the internet, effectively sharing them with millions of total strangers worldwide.

Knowingly or not, those amateur pornagraphers are advertising themselves and their sexually-explicit photos for all the world to see. As the parents of Jessica Logan discovered too late, doing so can have long-term and disastrous effects on the girls involved. No matter their ages, the teens are not immune from charges of possessing and transmitting child pornography, either, even with regard to their own pictures.

Why they get involved in such self-destructive behavior is a complex topic only partially explicable by immaturity. There is also our highly-sexualized culture, the movies teens see, the music they listen to, the resultant moral decline, parental laxity and, the most dominating influence, peer pressure.

Since kids spend so many of their waking hours in their schools, it would be more than reasonable to expect that those schools be involved not only in student curriculum but in any illicit extracurricular activities. Unfortunately, that would be an incorrect assumption, which proved to be yet another revelation to the Logans.

Officials at Jessica’s school, not unexpectedly, were not only ineffectual but they virtually ignored Jessica’s plight. Fully aware of the harassment she was enduring both during and after school hours, they did nothing constructive to shield her from the bullying: “The Logans said [that her high school] and the school resource officer didn’t do enough to help Jessie. [They] sent truancy notices… but no calls or letters about what was happening to [their] daughter in school and no notices to other parents about explicit cell-phone photos. And no charges were filed by the resource officer.”

School administrators are usually far more inclined to take the path of least resistance and to avoid bringing attention to serious problems in hopes they will go away on their own. Involving law enforcement authorities would inevitably mean negative publicity which is as anathema to school administrators as it is to politicians. So, for all intents and purposes, Jessica was set adrift to contend with her personal devils and ultimately succumbed to what her mother called her “torture.”

America’s youths, especially young girls, are in a dire crisis. Sexting is but one more spoke in their crisis wheel which, added to the many other critical challenges they face, has the potential of destroying many more young lives.

92 by ~cicozum on deviantART

When you call a suicide hotline, you speak with an individual who is trained to counsel you through your crisis. Your call may be routed to a counselor who’s located nearby so you can gain access to additional helpful information exclusive to your area. This type of information may include phone numbers to free or low cost suicide counseling centers, free sheltering for runaway teens, temporary food and housing for abused women, and more.

Since the number one cause of suicide is untreated depression, your telephone counselor will also describe ways in which you can get treatment. Help is available and if you’re feeling suicidal, you should call your local suicide hotline immediately.  Over 30,000 Americans commit suicide every year and about 750,000 attempt it. These numbers are simply too large – especially when you consider the fact that fewer people die from murder!

Don’t become another statistic. Don’t be that person. You’re a human being who matters – not a digit in a 5 figure number. If you’re between the ages of 15 and 24, depressed, and having suicidal thoughts, you’re at risk. Suicidal thoughts include:

• Planning when, where, and how you might commit suicide
• Imagining how sad your friends and family would feel upon your death
• Imagining your body in a coffin or grave (or both)
• Thinking about killing yourself as a way to hurt others 

If you have thoughts similar to these, you need professional treatment. Call a suicide hotline and speak with a counselor who can help you make an appointment with a doctor right away.

Kelly Bush is a founding member and Vice President of the Lee Eric Drake Foundation.

www.LeeEricDrake.com

www.Suicide.us.com

Funeral by ~GinnyGlorious on deviantART

Breakdown

Hurtful Words
© By Ingrid Fidler

When you say those hurtful things
Shut up! And Go away!
Do you ever stop to think?
How they might ruin my day?

All the very hurtful things
That you seem to love to say
Makes my self-esteem
Seem to fade away.

I lay down to go to sleep
But all I can do is cry
Thinking about those hurtful words
That just make me want to die.

I get up each and every morning
Not wanting to go to school today
Because I am very worried
About what hurtful things you’ll say.

Every night I kneel by my bed
And very silently pray
That I won’t have to listen
To any hurtful words the next day

After praying for me
I very silently say
Why ever the person is bullying
Make the problem go away.

We don’t have to be best pals
You don’t even need to be my friend
All that I am gracefully asking
Is that all the hurtful words should end.

Read More

ballet by ~fernyday on deviantART

This is a story about Mary. It is based on a true story which happened in Sherbrooke, Quebec.

—-

One day a teacher noticed Mary crying softly. She went over and asked what was wrong. Mary wiped her eyes and said, “Nothing. I am okay. Really. I am fine.”

The next day the gym teacher noticed several long scars on Mary’s arm. She asked Mary how she got the cuts. Mary said, “My cat scratched me.” The gym teacher said, “Are your sure? Those don’t look like cat scratches to me.” Mary said, “I am sure. I am fine. Really.”

The next day the gym teacher decided to tell the school counselor about Mary’s cuts. The school counselor called Mary into the office. She asked Mary if she was feeling okay lately. Mary said, “Yes. I am fine. Really. I promise.” The school counselor said, “Are you sure? Is everything okay at home?” Mary said, “Yes. Everything is fine. It is perfect. Really.”

The next day at home Mary started walking towards the door. Her mother said, “Where are you going?” Mary said, “For a walk.” Her mother said, “You look depressed. Are you okay? Don’t lie to me.” Mary said, “Yes. I am fine. I am just going for a walk. I promise. I will be back soon.” The mother said, “Are you sure everything is okay? You have been acting very strangely lately.” As she walked out the door Mary said, “Yes. Everything is fine. It is perfect. Really.”

Mary walked over to her father’s house. She took out her extra key and went inside. She knew he would not be home yet because he always worked late. She went to the closet where he kept his hunting rifle. She took it out and loaded it with the cartridges from the top shelf. She sat down on the floor inside the closet and closed the door. She pointed the gun to her head. She closed her eyes and told herself, “Everything is fine. It is perfect. Really.” Then she pulled the trigger.

—

A little background information.

At 12 months old Mary was told to stop crying.

At 2 years old Mary was told big girls don’t cry.

At 6 years old Mary was told to stop complaining.

At 12 years old Mary was told she was being melodramatic.

At 14 years old Mary was found dead in her father’s closet.

Read more.

Well, just what is huffing paraphernalia?  First let’s say that huffing is the act of bringing a substance into your body through breathing of it.  Normally it is a simple household product.  Paraphernalia is the stuff that is used to aid in huffing. Most people when they hear of huffing, they think of glue and paint and when you hear of teenagers huffing your reaction was probably like mine would have been a year ago. “Oh yeah I’ve heard of that, but I don’t have to worry about it. My teenagers are too smart to do something so stupid”.  Besides that there is no huffing paraphernalia in my house!

Oh yes I can freely admit that I was like a lot of parents, really quite in the dark about what inhalant abuse meant. I usually associated the term with a mental picture of the “crass idiots” that sat slumped over in the seedy alleys of our town.

What I now know is inhalant abuse and huffing paraphernalia is a very different thing than simply sniffing glue or paint fumes; not only that, it is not just the wild indigent people of life or the seedy low lives that we envision as we compare them to our own child.  No, anyone can get into huffing. Huffing and huffing paraphernalia hit very close to home one year and though the circumstances were devastating for me it opened my eyes to what my teens may be doing. 

My friend Christine was happily married; she had two teenage children, one boy and a girl.  She was in all ways, just like me.  At least up until the day, her son Paul was arrested for huffing and driving.  The community was stunned.  How could this happen and how could we as parents missed it?  She tore into her son with words, trying to find out what and how it happened.  She was met with, “I’m sorry Mom, this was my first time, I swear it, I promise I will never do it again.” 

Oh yes the parental ahh and oohh flowed freely then.  He was cured.  He was caught, this incident was over.  Yes, right here someone should have come up and slapped “dumb parents walking” on our foreheads.”

A month later Christine got a phone call that her son was in the hospital, he had been caught huffing.  She slammed the phone down and had ripped into his room, looking for anything that might be considered huffing paraphernalia.  What was he huffing? She looked everywhere and  what she found shocked her.  In the closet, under his bed, in the drawers, were cans of air freshener, household cleaners, there was whip cream cans, nail polish, paint cans and baggies. How could she have missed all this huffing paraphanelia?

I got the phone call from Christine after spending days in the hospital with her son, he simply could not recover from the huffing he had done.  Her son was dead.  More than her son Paul died that night.  The innocence of a whole community did and hopeful the impact on the teens of this town were well felt. 

I can only add for anyone that is reading this, if you think or know someone that is “playing around with inhalants”, get them help. Expose it.  Don’t worry what they are saying or thinking.  Just do it.  Don’t think because it is a cleaning supply that is safe in your house, that is safe from your kids.  Look at it with new eyes.  See huffing paraphernalia when you see a bottle of white out.  Whatever you believe, don’t believe that inhalants can’t hurt, because believe me they can kill.

Author:   EmbarrassedNoMore

With suicide as the third leading cause of death among adolescents in the United States, a new University of Denver study reveals inhaling or “huffing” vapors of common household goods, such as glue or nail polish, are associated with increased suicidal thoughts and attempts.   Read About the Study HERE.

After scouring the internet and researching all the information I could find I have come to this conclusion, which of course is just my opinion.  It seems to me that Teen Rainbow Sex parties started as an Urban Legend which grew after Oprah talked about it on her show.  I can just imagine all the teens sitting around talking about this and then deciding that they have to try it because it seemed like everyone else was doing it.  It kind of seems like media, parents and written material have taught kids all they need to know about this scary teen trend.  Would kids have ever even started doing this if adults hadn’t started discussing it?

 NY Times - “Rainbow parties are group oral sex parties in which each girl wears a different shade of lipstick, and each guy tries to emerge sporting every one of the various colors.

But in reality, how common are rainbow parties? It’s hard to say.

Certainly, almost any sexual practice that can be imagined stands a good chance of having been tried somewhere, sometime. But many sex researchers and adolescent-health professionals say that rainbow parties are not a big part of teenage sexual behavior.

“This ‘phenomenon’ has all the classic hallmarks of a moral panic,” said Dr. Deborah Tolman, director of the Center for Research on Gender and Sexuality at San Francisco State University. “One day we have never heard of rainbow parties and then suddenly they are everywhere, feeding on adults’ fears that morally bankrupt sexuality among younger teens is rampant, despite any actual evidence, as well as evidence to the contrary.”

Oral sex has, undoubtedly, become part of many teenagers’ sexual repertory. According to the 1995 National Survey of Adolescent Males, released in 2000, about half of boys aged 15 to 19 had received oral sex from a girl, and slightly more than a third had performed it. A 2004 NBC-People survey of 13- to 16-year- olds found that 12 percent had engaged in oral sex, and 4 percent of those - or less than half a percent overall - had been to an oral sex party.

Dr. Tolman and others said most teenagers would avoid such parties.

“One of the reasons this is so dubious to me,” Dr. Tolman said, “is that girls, particularly early adolescents, are still getting labeled as sluts and suffering painful consequences. The double standard is remarkably intact. So what could be girls’ motivations for participating in such parties? And I can’t quite imagine, even for a moment, teenage boys comparing their lipstick rings.”

Many say rainbow parties are just a new urban legend - suburban, actually - not much more trustworthy than the old stories about alligators in the sewer. ” - NY Times

 

It is truly amazing what you can learn by simply listening while driving your young teenager to her many activities. I learned that this girl was pregnant (age 14) and that another was “engaged” (age 15). I also learned about a recent twist to some old favorites from when I was growing up.

Teens Snorting Kool Aid/Pixie Stix

Remember those Kool Aid commercials where a smiling stay at home mom serves the whole neighborhood of children playing in her back yard a “wholesome” treat of flavored sugar water known as Kool Aid? The drink that came to be known as the one that gave you a Kool Aid smile? You know the stains across your mouth from drinking something containing not only sugar but dyes? As parents many of us have moved past the Kool Aid smile, but our teens may have found another use for those Kool Aid packets.

One way that teens are enjoying their own version of the Kool Aid smile is picking up these cheap packets at a local grocery store 5/$1.00. After that they may “drink” the packet - no water needed or simply scoop it out by the spoonful much like the candy Fun Dip. This, while annoying and giving my daughter way too much sugar and red dye no. whatever was not as bad as what I next discovered. “Mom, this isn’t so bad, other people snort it!” Yes, parents, you heard my teenager right - they SNORT the Kool Aid powdered drink mix much like cocaine. Why you ask? I know I did. Because it gives you a “high.”

When you snort it the chemicals and sugars like explode in your nose, yes it can be painful as they teens in the back of my mother’s suburban assault vehicle laughed and giggled over “Erin” who even after doing it the first time and running screaming from the room in pain returned only to do it again - to the other nostril. How do they snort the Kool Aid packet? Place some of their finger; use a rolled up dollar bill or a straw. They can be quite inventive- even substituting Pixie Stix for the Kool Aid.

Teens Smoking and Snorting Smarties

But this was not my only enlightening experience. Opening Easter Eggs from a community Easter Egg Hunt my 14 year old daughter and her best friend explode into laughter. What brought on these peal of laughter and giggles? Smarties. Yes, Smarties, those little round sweet and sour candies in plastic wrapper that I remember eating as child. Apparently there is a new use for this candy - “smoking smarties,” as well as snorting them like the Kool Aid dust. Of course the girls claim they don’t quite know how it works but there are some kids at school who do it. My daughter and her friend claim it is “stupid” and looks “silly” for which I am thankful, but what is smoking smarties?

What is smoking Smarties?

It is amazing what you can find on the internet. Thanks to You Tube I found out how and why you could smoke smarties. First you crush up the Smarties then inhale. Blow out then there is smoke, through either mouth or nose. Why would kids do this? Because it’s fun? Yes, that’s what they say. It is like smoking for real, teens see this as a cute, funny imitation of smoking.

What are the dangers of Smoking Smarties and Snorting Candy?

Quite possibly the most talked about danger of this type of imitative behavior in teens and children is that it could be a “gateway” to other riskier behavior such as smoking cigarettes or marijuana or snorting drugs like cocaine.

According to Mark Shikowitz, an ear, nose and throat doctor at Schneider Children’s Hospital a nine year old attempting to snort Smarties didn’t get the powder fine enough and ended up with the candy lodged in his nose causing pain and discomfort until it dissolved. Other dangers with this behavior are that it could damage irritation to the throat, nose and even lungs. These are not life threatening injuries; however continued use could cause long term damage. Other dangers include Other dangers include chronic coughing and a version of smoker’s cough.

Oren Friedman, a Mayo Clinic nose specialist cautions, “Frequent use could lead to infections or even worse, albeit rare, conditions, such as maggots that feed on sugary dust wedged inside the nose.”

What does the company that manufactures Smarties say?

Eric Ostrow, vice president of sales and marketing at Ce De Candy Inc., which manufactures Smarties in Union, N.J states “It can be done with anything made with sugar and compressed — Necco Wafers, Conversation Hearts, SweeTarts, Lik-M-Aid is already pulverized and so is Pixy Styx,” Ostrow told the Journal. “I don’t want to be complimented that we’re the number one choice.” Further statements indicate that the children smoking Smarties are “misguided” and they hope this practice or “fad” to end quickly.

I remember growing up and getting excited about those candy cigarettes in my Halloween bag. I never considered that it was “cool” to smoke, so I ate them simply because I like the taste. Living with many smokers in my family (aunts, uncles and cousins) I had a pretty good idea that smoking was not for me. I didn’t like the smell or the taste (even after an uncle encouraged me to smoke behind my grandmother’s barn one day.) No one ever called them a “gateway” drug towards smoking, but I think they were done away with as smoking became less cool over the years - and more obviously a health hazard.

Is “smoking Smarties” a health hazard? Or a “gateway drug? Does this behavior indicate a predisposition or at the very least a deep interest in other drugs, like cigarettes or cocaine? There are obviously some health hazards with this behavior such as tearing the lining of your nose, sinus infections, chronic coughing and in rare cases maggots crawling up in there attracted to the sugar content. One school nurse mentions her fear that children will choke on the plastic wrapper as they inhale the powder in their mouths. Fad or failing, it is definitely a behavior parents should be monitoring closely and in my house one which will have serious consequences. There are enough real dangers out there without having to worry about those that may occur as the result of what I term “reckless behavior with candy.” As for a gateway drug, far too many of the videos I watched included teens joking about their own “cocaine” and being a “natural addict.” While the behavior itself may not be the gateway, obviously what teens think about the behavior is a gateway to more risky addictions, behavior and decisions.

Sources:
Wall Street Journal

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123750945477390601.html

Fox News

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,509932,00.html

Snorting Kool Aid Videos

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=snorting+koolaid&search_type=&aq=f

Snorting Pixie Stix Video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGR6n7Rimkg

Written by:  Lisa Carey
Specializations: children, parents, romance, reviews, consumer protection & travel. Visit newcreativewriting.com for business and personal services information. - Full profile